anunda - the gentle art of transpersonal communication
education, counseling and parenting

Hearing the Children

The first breath of a child

Someone wrote to me ...
'I was at the birth also of all my children and one thing I noticed is that the baby seems lifeless and does not appear alive until he takes his first breath. One of my children spent over a minute in this condition before he breathed and it made me quite nervous. I can imagine how a parent would feel with a stillborn.'


As one who has experience as a 'midwife' (with medical supervision), I have found that this fear is prevalent amongst all fathers and mothers.

the fear that their child will be born dead.

As one who has worked with people in the remembering of their first breath, I have found it very common that this fear from parents is remembered deep in the unconscious of the body ...

and can quite often be the underlying source of fear of death
which arises late in the dying process.

I have had experiences of being with dying people who expressed this fear out loud and when I told them they did not have to keep on breathing for their father or mother, they have slipped quietly and quickly away ..

As a 'midwife' who has been able to maintain contact with a number
of the children as they grew up, I have found that if the child has been allowed to remain connected to the placenta until the placenta stops pulsing, the child begins to breathe spontaneously and that the breathing characteristics are quite different to those experienced when a child has the umbilicus cut and breathing is induced and the behavioural map of the child is quite different.

These first breath memories
are stored in the spine at the base of the neck
in the vertebrae T (thoracic) 1 .. and can be released.

Now .. before anyone jumps down my throat here .. I am not placing a judgement on any birthing process that may have been experienced by anyone on this list .. because each case is individual .. and each child/mother must be treated according to the best advice available at the time.

What I am saying ..

is that, as we grow up, we do remember the circumstances of the first breath we took, and we, as new born infants, feel the hopes and fears,
the thoughts feelings and emotions
of those present in the room at the moment of first breath ..
and unless they are addressed,
we can carry them through to our grave ...

and they unconsciously affect our life ..

There is another habit which can exacerbate this memory ..
if a mother (or father) constantly checks to see
if the child is breathing ...

then the memory of the fear around the first breath is re-enforced,

and the behavioural characteristic that arises is that everything that the child does through life (yes .. even as a fully grown adult) is based on proving to mother (or father) that it is alive ..

and if the parent fails to take notice of the child, then the actions will become more demonstrable until the recognition that the infant is breathing is satisfied.


| Home | Index | Map | Search | Discussion List |
Your Responsibility and our DisclaimerAbout Us and this site
Copyright - LifeStreams - All Rights Reserved 1998-2000

Support Index